“I have a bone to pick with you Mr. Mills” said the dad who came to parent teacher interviews….
I remember thinking, “What did I do this time?” as that list could be long and loud!!!!
Forward Friday is a memory lane reflection of being thankful for all that has come my way in the 62 years I’ve lived but in no way am I ready to stop now… There is life to be lived!!! Enjoying living Life To The Fullest!! And as always, there is Good News medicine at the end!!
Let’s Get Into This!!
The dad said, “My son came home and said that my wife and I are boring at 40 years old in comparison to Mr. Dave who is 60 and I wanted to meet the guy who isn’t boring him like we do!”
At least we could laugh it off or at least I walked away chuckling thinking that a 15-year-old thought I was somewhat with “It” although friends would say otherwise……
I look at where I’ve come from, and it is a wonderful story.
-Born on the beautiful island of Bermuda…
-Came here when my grandfather passed away and my parents ended up staying and starting a new life here because of complications.
-I had the privilege of growing up in a neighborhood of Italians, Ukrainians, French, English and those growing up moments helped formulate my love for people.
-Both my elementary school and high schools, while not perfect also gave me a rich culture of diversity of peoples, languages, opinions and culture.
-I had the incredible honor of having 2 of the most thoughtful, loving, wise, intelligent, God-fearing parents anyone could ever or want to have….
-A great brother who, although taller than me is still a nice guy………
-Going through college and university, was trying to figure out what for my life and finally hitting on Special Education and Bible College.
-The work experience of working in a department store and a fast-food restaurant have continually paid huge dividends long after those days were over.
-Volunteering and eventually starting my education career at Westmount High is still a highlight that keeps on giving.
-Working in 2 area churches as a youth, university, music, outreach minister are moments that shaped me.
-Who would have thought that we could have opened and run a homeless center for 2 years? Crazy but we did. It sensitized me to the plight of the homeless and the less fortunate in ways I would have never thought.
-Working in an indigenous youth detention center for a period of time that I would have never thought possible only to gain an understanding of pain so deep that some of the behaviors and struggles made sense for the depth of agony so many precious young people have endured and still endure to today.
-Getting back into the school system to this present day in so many functions was and is still exciting; I mean hanging out with teenagers every day will do that to somebody.
-Starting a catering company on the side and receiving a government kitchen manager’s certificate along the way have been nothing short of wow, can’t believe it sometimes.
-The blessing of friends through the years..................................
-Still passionate about hockey and playing every week and certified to become a referee some years ago; love being on a sheet of ice!!!
-Blogging and writing each week has been both a discipline and joy…..
-Finding my place back in a healthy, growing church has been rewarding, spiritually, mentally, socially... In every metric possible, this life change has been so good!
Incredible friends over the years……
-I’ve been blessed to have Miss. Kelly running this road of life with me for 26 years now and although she’s crazy, she’s getting better by the moment. I couldn’t ask for more in one who would share life’s journey with.
-Realizing that so many of my experiences have helped me in every step from way back when up until today continues to count me as grateful…..
But….
It would be a picture that is missing colors and contrasts if I didn’t give a fuller picture of some of the hurts, bruises, welts, disappointments that have also shaped my path.
Not a victim but those experiences also have given depth to my life.
-Some things are easier to get over or through than others: things like:
-A childhood trauma that threatened to take away my innocence and the only reason why there was not a complete innocence loss was the mercy and grace of God.
-Struggled for many years with an eating disorder…
-Struggled with suicidal thoughts for many years...
-3 major back operations that threw a wrench into post-secondary schooling for 2 plus years….
-Failed relationships both romantic and friendships that struck deep hurts to the core…
-Firing from a place of employment that created self-confidence and expertise doubts…
-The loss of my parents took a huge toll
These could all be reasons to call it a day, pack it in and say that life would appear hopeless but…..
Now For Some Good Medicine……
Deep down, even in the darkest of times, I believed that there was light in the distance… I didn’t know how far the light was from where I was, but it was what kept me in the most unhinged moments of my life.
Even though I couldn’t articulate or tell about some of the things that were happening to me or had happened, my parents always were praying for me.
Ultimately, I’ve realized that the hand of Jesus was on my life and holding me together until I could be put back together.
And even though I didn’t know all that was happening to me back then or recognizing later the extent of what the childhood trauma had tried to inflict in and on my life, I thank God for praying family and mentors.
I’m thankful that I still have a destiny and future to pursue.
So, what do we do with some of those things from the backside of our lives that seems to show up to try and make the present and future somewhat smelly?
Sometimes, those backside of life issues threaten to create a dullness or numbness to the life we presently lead and we can miss out on the good things that we can not only just live but live to the fullest.
Some Very Simple Yet Profound Thoughts
At A Certain Point, It’s Just Time To Make Peace With The Past.
Our journey comes with all sorts of bumps along the way and while pain is no respecter of persons, God doesn’t let pain go wasted.
There are lessons in the seasons of pain to be learned, growth that helps us, the ability to comfort others who go through their moments of struggle and pain.
What sufferings have we underwent to get to where we are, and the big question is, did they make us better or bitter?
While we may want to blow it off since it sounds so cliché, the truth is, many have never gotten past this point because bitterness has laid hold and the net has crippled the spirit…
It’s been said that if we don't make peace with our past, we cannot stand effective in our present or future.
It may not be easy, it may be painful to wrestle with the issues that have held us up but to move forward towards health, we can’t ignore what we’ve struggled with.
I know that there were many times where I would inadvertently focus on the things I lost or felt I lost…. But the day(s) when I’ve looked in my hand and realized the blessings of what I had in my hand, life changed for the better.
One of my mentors said to me after a particularly difficult loss and it caused me to stop and really evaluate the reality of what was actually true.
She said, “What you have in your hand is enough.”
It really caught my attention and has helped me over time when the thoughts of those things lost seemed to outweigh the wonderful things in my hand.
As I think about where I’ve come on this road of life, I know that I’m just getting started; so much life to live, so many wonderful things to discover, dreams, visions and roads to walk and there isn’t time to be dull or numb.
And when we can’t go any further, I know God has something to say about doing life, walking along side of us as we walk our road.
Some Trustworthy Sayings:
Isaiah 35:2-4 Yes, there will be an abundance of flowers and singing and joy! The deserts will become as green as the mountains of Lebanon, as lovely as Mount Carmel or the plain of Sharon. There the Lord will display his glory, the splendor of our God. With this news, strengthen those who have tired hands, and encourage those who have weak knees. Tell fearful souls, “Courage! Take heart! God is here, right here, on his way to put things right and redress all wrongs. He’s on his way! He’ll save you!”
Hebrews 12:2 And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.
Philippians 3:12 I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. 13 No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.
Romans 8:38-39 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
So, I’m thankful that I’ve seen the days I’ve seen but I’m excited for the days to come!!! No time to be dull or numb and the remedy for me is that I still have a destiny and future to pursue and with God’s help, what he’s put in my hand is enough!!
Birthdays are a blessing!!!! Progress 2023
Dave
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