It’s hard to believe that this past Mother’s day was the 3rd time that we didn’t get to spend with and celebrate Mom.
It’s hard to even adjust to the concept still that Mom is not with us and is at home in heaven now.
While we are glad that she doesn’t have to endure any more pain and certainly glad that Mom didn’t have to witness and be part of the mess that is this pandemic we are currently having to endure and go through, we miss her terribly.
That being said, as I think about Mom and all that she meant to Keith and I plus countless others, I come away with not only great memories etc., I also think of some of her legacy and how it lives on in me.
Forward Friday is all about the legacy that Mom, the irreplaceable Bumble Bea has left with a few thoughts that are Legacy Worthy!
Here’s to you Mom and thank you….
Love For People
I just know that our house was always bustling with activity.
You could be sure that if the neighborhood kids were anywhere, it was in our yard, in our house.
Mom always had some treats on hand and to this day, I think most of our friends were not there to only play but to get those treats and the hugs from mom.
There were many a day I would come home from school and the front door would be wide open and no Mom in sight (we could do that back then).
Then I would look across the street and there she was in all her glory, talking to people outside the grocery store or at the neighborhood pharmacy adjacent to the grocery store.
Talking people up, wanting to know how they were doing.
Or coming home and people were either standing on the bottom rung of the stairs to the porch or sitting on the porch chatting with Mom.
Mom Just Loved People.
My buddies from church loved coming for Sunday dinner after morning service because they would always get the army meal portions and the best china to eat it on… all the time…
I would say that these clowns didn’t need the best china but Mom would always say that we needed to give them the best and treat them the best!! Seriously……..
When Kelly and I started hanging out, Mom loved Kelly like her own from the hop and little did she know that she become the void filler for my wife because Kelly really didn’t have a stable or normal relationship with her own mom.
Kelly was the daughter Mom always wanted and she loved Kelly to the moon and back.
Even going to doctor’s appointments would be an adventure.
How many times would we be on a time count but Mom would want to introduce me to her new friend she met in the waiting room 5 minutes earlier which meant we would have to “get to know” that new friend.
We’d get to the car and I would say something like, “Ma, we need to get to the next place or appointment”, to which Mom would often reply, “We need to be kind and get to know people!” okay, so that didn’t really work now did it?
Secretly, I loved seeing Mom in actions from when I could remember my earliest recollections to her later years…..
Legacy Mom Moment #1 Love fiercely with intention: You may not always win but you’ll win far more than you’ll ever lose!! So True!!
Be The Same Guy Everywhere!
If there is one thing Mom taught me that she didn’t always have to say but was clearly evident was to be the same Dave everywhere.
That no one should ever have to look at us in one setting to see one thing but then in another setting see someone completely different.
With Mom, what you saw was what you got….everywhere in every situation….
Sometimes, people would ask if she was like she was in public at home.
You mean crazy, fun, interesting, inquisitive, asking questions about others with care, kind, no malice, trusting, forgiving nature, water off a duck’s back attitude and more?
Absolutely yes. Mom would say that it would be hypocritical to be one thing in one place and quite the opposite in another.
Mom would say that if people saw a different Dave in 2 places, how could they trust me because they then couldn’t be sure who they would be dealing with at any given time.
That medicine has stuck with me because how could I not try and emulate the true blue nature that Mom was because Mom was genuine, true, honest, caring, loving, a gatherer of people, a deep love for people, think the best of people type that I rarely have seen in my years on the planet.
Legacy Mom Moment #2 Be The Same Person Wherever You Are No Matter The Time It Is….
Good Medicine Moment
Love Jesus
I think of all the things my Mom was that has influenced me greatly was her love for Jesus.
Many would not know this because of her nature and humor but mom was an accomplished Sunday School/Bible Teacher.
While my dad was the ordained minister plus a whole lot of other Swiss army knife like skills, Mom quietly was very knowledgeable in her skill set of being a teacher.
I think how she raised us was key to our growth; Mom never forced anything down our throats but from the earliest lessons about faith I can recall to how she lived her life in front of us, how we could hear her pray for us constantly, especially in the crazy teenage years, Mom modeled Jesus with grace, truth and love with humility and honor.
I know the times when I was veering off course and getting stupid, not once did Mom ever berate, scream or yell (she did say if dad ever found out about some of the dumb stuff, I would have had a quick ticket to heaven early…) but she would say that she would be praying for my eyes to be opened.
Those words were like heat seeking missiles and made the dumb stuff look real dumb.
Even when there were crisis moments, some that I couldn’t even quantify with words because I didn’t know what I was dealing with but I knew I was in pain, Mom would just love me, pray with me and constantly let me know she was standing with me… and that more importantly, Jesus was standing with me…………
For that and so much more, I am grateful for my Mom.
Legacy Mom Moment #3 Learning To Continually Love Jesus For Me Like Mom Showed Me
So it is with a heavy heart that I say that 3 Mother’s days later, I miss Mom as much as the day she left us for Heaven back in January of 2019 but I am grateful for Legacy Memories that etch the landscape of my mind, heart and spirit….
The Legacy of Beatrice Mary Dancy Mills!!
I will always be in awe of the simple girl from Montreal who against many odds turned out to be the Golden Bumble Bea that everyone loved and adored!!!
Walking the road with Mom close by…
Dave
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