So I’ll admit that this was hard to write. Maybe I was thinking that so many memories would rush in and I wouldn’t be able to carry my trend of thoughts regarding mom and Mother’s day.
I wondered if 18 months later, would I feel like I did a year ago, not being able to bring home flowers and harass the woman who was my fiercest advocate for the first time and it would be near impossible to say anything because of the ache.
But as I have been thinking about mom, I’ve also been thinking about those that I know well and also others who have recently lost their moms during this quarantine time and how hard it has been because in many cases, final good byes are not like they normally are.
Final good byes are not like they normally are.
I’ve thought of those whose moms have been gone a long time but the dull ache never leaves so it became pretty clear that maybe, just maybe, telling some stories and recalling some memories of mom might brighten the hearts, minds of those who live the same little dream;
We wish we had one more minute, one more moment, one more hour, one more day with the mom we loved and still love.
My earliest memories of mom were varied:
The week of being in my room in the dark when I had the chicken pox and macaroni and cheese was the hit; because mom was always changing it up meal wise but because I was sick, I had it for that whole week.
Of course, as soon as I was better, didn’t have mac & cheese for a month. Mom’s rules.
The time when I was downstairs in the shoemakers and mom had warned me not to touch the white stick with the fire on the end but you guessed it, I had to try and do what I saw Mr. Prendegast do.
In between the hacking and loud coughing, I didn’t notice the Bumble Bea coming and she stung a Bea Stinger of a slap on my back side and that was the first day I decided that it may not be a good idea to really “Cross” mom!
The time when coming home on the school bus for lunch that I dragged Tom off the bus and was wailing on him (payback for beating me up 3 weeks earlier and not shutting up about it) in front of my house.
One minute I am a vintage wrestler beating my foe, the next minute, I am in the air not touching the ground and moving towards my house. Looking down and realizing that mom just carried a 140 lb boy in the air 60 feet, sat me down, put her hands on my shoulders and said Breathe”!
That became the official, I will not mess with this woman because that my friend, scared me straight!!!!!
The time when I didn’t want to go to grad because my heart had been broken by a girl; yet mom was determined that I not miss it. So she called a tailor friend of hers downtown and got me to go to rent a tuxedo. He charged me $5 for it. Didn’t know that mom had come 2 days before and paid the other $45 ($50 can you imagine? That means something about my age, I think.)
Mom knew that if I didn’t go, I would be regretting not being with my friends and missing out on that memory. Still wasn’t excited but glad I did go.
The time when I got a puck in the mouth and was rushed to the Montreal General Hospital. My dad took one look and walked away, best friend was mad at me for weeks for taking off my cage but mom hugged me; bloodied, lip ripped, extensive surgery, dental and cosmetic to come and just said, “it’s going to be alright!”
Funny part to this story was that the next week, I was graduating from college. I was wired shut (I think a lot of people were happy about that) and after the ceremonies, dad said he was taking me/us all out to eat. And where did we go? A Steakhouse. I drank broth through a straw. Dad and my brother’s idea mom said… hmmmmm
The time after becoming a minister that anytime I would be doing something silly or whatever, mom would say, “Now Pastor Dave!”
The time(s) after being fired that mom would call me in to her room to check on me and then to pray for me that I would not lose hope but to be hopeful for the future.
The time that she said after breakfast, “I want to go to Atlanta to visit Dale!” “When can we make it happen?” And 2 months later, we arrive in Georgia so mom could see her third favorite son. Mom just loved the fact that we pretty much got up and took off to do something she really wanted to do.
The time when I came home after my first real encounter with Kelly and mom knew before I did that something was brewing.
The time(s) on the road into and after wedding day that mom was beyond jubilant that her boy was getting married.
Some might have said that she was glad I was getting out of the house.
The time(s) that she treated Kelly as her daughter from the hop.
Being grateful for being able to have a daughter to do things with and spend time with.
The fact that mom never had a harsh word for anyone; even to those that harmed her or her family, diplomacy at its finest.
You couldn't push her around but she was artful in how she handled relationships with people.
Mom always wanted our friends to come over to the house. We didn't like all the time because they would eat all the food but for mom, it was awesome! Keith and I, not so much but I think we did too!
The joy to which she lived life in spite of her early years, the struggles of many kinds but you wouldn’t know it as mom carried joy from the inside out and shared that joy with everyone and anyone she’d meet.
The spiritual heritage and influence she had and still has on my life is indelible; I cannot be more proud of whose I am.
How mom complemented dad and I see it more and more as I walk on this pilgrim pathway how they both have positively affected my life.
When I think of Mom:
To never give up…
That Hope does spring eternal…
That faith and how I live that out is bedrock to my life..
To allow true joy that God gives spring out of me…
Don’t keep what you have to yourself……
Forgiving is a quality that will benefit you always
Protect and be loyal even when others aren’t
Family and friends matters
Mom, I wish we had one more day and while I am not crushed like I was last year, there is this dull ache that never goes away.
Your bedroom is still yours but it is now a guest room.
It's bright, airy, inviting and I know you would have liked what Kelly did to honor you.
I think the best thing about the room is your slogan, “It’s Going To Get Better”.
I didn’t know how I was going to work through missing you but yet I am standing a year later.
It doesn’t mean I miss you less; in fact, I miss you more!
Happy Mothers Day in Heaven! I hope you and the angels are singing a new song today! I don’t know what that song may be but I can hear your voice now!
Love you Mom
Going to pay you a visit tomorrow and will leave a ginger ale because Canada Dry is the champagne of Ginger Ales! Only for the best!!!
#ForwardFriday #Saturday #MothersDay #Missmom #Blog #Hope #Silly #Funny #Loving #Caring #Godlywoman #Loyal #Joyful #FierceAdvocate #treasure
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