Friends: “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he/she knows you are slightly cracked.”
“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like ‘What about lunch?'”
Forward Friday continues Quality Matters, Friendship talks. Friends and the value of those relationships have profound effects on the road we walk. And as usual, there’s always good news medicine at the end!!!
Let’s Get Into This:
I was talking to a friend after church the other day. We have been friends since we were teenagers but only recently reconnected over the past year.
As we talked, one thing was apparent: what drew us to become friends back then are still the same things that mean something to us now when it comes to relationships.
Loyalty, honesty, listening, confidence, healing and easy going are great traits that I look for in a friend.
What does some of these qualities look like in real time, real life?
Good For Me-Loyal
Blind loyalty has never been a smart way to live ever but when we walk with those who have integrity, there becomes or should be a loyalty that comes because of the mileage of walking roads together.
We/they can be counted on as those in each other’s corner. One of the things that I appreciate about many of my friendships is the loyalty factor.
Sometimes, I’ve had to let go of some friendships that at one time had great value but when loyalty/trust was breached, things were never the same again.
Not easy but lessons that needed to be learned.
Good For Me-They Listen Well
The listening component is so essential for a good friend. A good friend gives us room to speak, ask questions, validate our emotions, and helps us find perspective. These friends are good at helping us see things in a new light.
Good For Me-Confidence Is Contagious
It should be that the relationships we have are life giving, growing and bring positive, mutual contributions to our lives.
Confidence is an important trait for a quality friend. These friends are comfortable with themselves and comfortable with us.
Confidence that inspires us, draws us out, lends or inspires courage when we feel like we don’t seem to have it, gives us confidence to move forward even when it seems like we can’t climb that mountain.
Good For Me-Non-Judgmental
Real friends never make us feel bad for being ourselves. With a good friend, we can. Still able to be to tell us the things we need to hear when needed.
Good For Me-Healing
Make Time For Them: It's too easy to let time move and we feel like life is too busy to make time to be together.
Dad would often say, "Time Waits For No Man"
Appreciate Your Crew: So many times, we say that we'll say something the next time to let them know how much they mean to us... But then........
Don't let the moments slip any longer; big or small. It's been said that one of the currencies of relationships is genuine appreciation.
Quality over quantity. We don't need 100's of friends; we just need a few quality ones!!
It's amazing how much healing can come from the times we spend with special friends that make a difference in our lives..
So Now For Some Good Medicine
This story of David and Jonathan always grips me; it is such a vivid picture of what a real, deep friendship could look like for us.
We talked last post about how friendship is actually a gift from God and that a true friend is well...True and this friendship fit that bill to the maximum.
In fact, in many ways, when I think of how Jesus loved and loves us, it is the same type of picture.
It is no small thing to call someone your friend because Friendship is a big deal.
“The wise man/woman chooses their friends carefully.”
I've been amazed at how, over the years, God has used quality friends to help me grow in my faith, life, work, outside interests while at the same time providing me with opportunities to help them grow, too. And I hope I did/do half as well as they do.
My 2 Takeaways About Friendship
A True Friend Loves Us As He/She Loves Himself/Herself (1 Samuel 18:1; 20:17)
There are 2 times that we read that Jonathan loved David as he loved himself. Even Jesus tells us to love each other: “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39).
And Jesus is the ultimate example of this type of love. He quite literally loved us in this way when He gave up His life for us! Pretty awesome that we all can have the opportunity to have this relationship with Him too!
A True Friend Helps Us Find Strength (1 Samuel 23:16)
As our world is spinning in weird, whacky ways and sometimes, we’re not sure which way is up or down, it helps that the people we call the closest have firm footing and they can point us in the direction of a Rock-Solid foundation.
Probably the most important part of this friendship was the bedrock strength/anchor and where it came from that helped both David and Jonathan weather the storms they went through.
It is an incredible testimony of friendship: “And Saul’s son Jonathan went to David at Horesh and helped him find strength in God” (1 Samuel 23:16).
I think that after drama moments, the surface moments, the frivolous things that don’t really matter at the end of the day, the quality of the friends we keep absolutely matter.
I had a friend who once said that they would rather just be a hermit in the backwoods than to associate with people.
Obviously, there was a backside story to those sentiments but later, as they were older, they wished they didn’t allow so much time to go by not investing and being invested through quality friendships.
We need friends. The Bible even says in Proverbs 27:9 speaks of the “pleasantness/appeal, likableness of a friend.”
In fact, I often think the older we get, the more important friends become to us. It takes a long time to make an old friend. And while we can’t usually pick our coworkers, family, we CAN certainly pick our friends.
I'm looking for great quality in friends. Friends who are strength builders and not those who take the life out of us.
The ones who help encourage us to climb to better places, to help us as we help them move forward.
David and Jonathan’s friendship was inspiring, but Jesus is an even greater friend!
So, I'm very humbled when someone thinks enough of me to call me friend; when we say that someone is our friend, may it be that together, we're helping each other grow to become the quality people we're intended to be!!
Quality on the road to great friendships!! Progress 2023
Dave
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